One Year Later

November 2, 2005..."You have cancer." This little sentence was said to me without much emotion. I did get an "I'm sorry" out of my doc, but I think it was more for lack of something to say than really being sincere. His bedside manner lacks a lot to be desired.

I can not believe that one year has passed. First and foremost, I am so thankful to be here one year later and in good health. I have been reflecting on my cancer journey for several days now. I still find it an interesting study in human emotion that while you go through cancer everyone wants in on ALL the details, but once you're "cured" people quickly put it behind them and don't think about it again. Maybe it is a coping mechanism...I'm not one to dwell on the past, but I don't think anyone will realize that it's been a year unless they read this blog. I doubt anyone will be concerned with how I'm coping . Maybe it's not for them to be concerned...maybe it's mine alone to deal with.

As I said before, I've been reflecting on this journey and I've learned a few things about myself along the way.

1. I am much stronger in mind and body than I ever thought.

2. I am pleased that I can comfortably rest in God's plan for my life and be content there even during times of heartache.

3. I want more children. Now with my ability to bear children gone, I am realizing that I am very open to adopting (even older children). I never had issues with adopting, I just didn't have the need. Now I realize there are so many children that just want a family. It's something we're exploring.

Life post-cancer is very similar to life pre-cancer. I was never one to sweat the small stuff, but I really am not concerned with it now. It's cliche, but life is short. Go out and live it! For me it's not about big houses and fancy cars...it's about loving my friends and family and enjoying each day for we aren't promised tomorrow.